Precious undivided attention
I’m one of the last generation that didn’t grow up with mobile phones - I received my first one just at the cusp of adulthood, at about 18 or 19 years old. I remember it well: a Nokia banana shaped device that could make phone calls, send texts (one letter at a time) and play Snake. I didn’t spend all day looking at it, but it did quickly become part of my everyday life that I took everywhere I went.
My children were born into a different world. Every adult they know has a mobile phone, and looks at it for long periods of time - doing things the adult perceives as useful, from banking to emailing to looking up directions to the next kids’ playdate. Things the adult does for the kids, too. Messaging other parents about meeting up. Buying second-hand kids clothes because of the most recent growth spurt. Looking up banana bread recipes.
These good things aren’t doom scrolling, they aren’t time wasting in the adult’s mind, but the kids often end up looking at the back of a mobile phone rather than a friendly face… and this has been bothering me for years now. Every New Year, every September as school starts, every summer holiday, I aim to spend less time on my mobile and more time giving my full attention to my kids more often than not: and I feel a failure at it whenever the urgent (phone notification) trumps the important (being fully available to the kids). The point is, though, I must continue to try.
Whenever I prioritise tasks over people, phones over connection, I act the opposite way to God our Father: whenever I turn to Him, His full attention is there! And in a way, that is what I’m hoping to model to my children: what God is like. Then perhaps I should let myself off the hook a bit for failing at that often, because truth be told, I do fall short quite a long way from what God is like! That is why I’m grateful for grace, and for being able to try again. And it goes both ways - God gives me His full attention, but He also deserves mine. When I pray, and find myself drifting off to mentally complete my to-do list, it’s in the coming back, in the intention, that I grow. Because if it wasn’t a struggle, there wouldn't be growth. Perhaps it’s a good thing my kids see my struggle, too, because in it they see my intention to pull away from the day-to-day demands of life and towards their hearts.
Let’s aim to grow in giving God our full, undivided attention today, in the knowledge that we have His.
